It's May, which means it's Mental Health Awareness month. I think it's important to talk about mental health, because it's ...
It's May, which means it's Mental Health Awareness month. I think it's important to talk about mental health, because it's something the majority of us are currently or will in the future, struggle with. So, as I said in the title, it's okay to not be okay and I'm not okay.
I've struggled with depression, anxiety, social anxiety, panic attacks, body dysmorphia, as well as other mental issues due to past trauma and abuse. We're not going into details today, that's not the point of this post. The point is to tell you that you're not alone. No matter what it is you're going through, you're never alone.
Lately, I've been seriously struggling. I'm freelancing and attending a full time software dev boot camp. My husband works 50+ hours per week, we share a car and we're on conflicting schedules. I'm going to class at 9, driving back home on my lunch break to take him to work, going back to class, leaving class in the evenings, getting as much work done as possible and picking him back up from work in basically the middle of the night. To say my days are stressful is an understatement.
I've been off all of my depression, anxiety, and migraine medications for a year now. I've been getting botox treatments to handle my migraines, but I'm on my own for stress and depression. Not only this, but I'm having other health problems. I'm back in a place where I'm unable to lose weight and I'm always so tired. I work out. I eat healthy 95% of the time. I now know I was able to lose weight previously because of the medications I was on and now I need to go back to the doctor to test my thyroid more thoroughly since it's not working as it should.
I'm not able to sleep without CBD as I mentioned in my last post because of things I've repressed for many years resurfacing. Some days are way more difficult than I feel I can handle, but I have. I've made it through everyday. I've tried to stay as positive as possible and it's an eternal battle it would seem.
The entire purpose of this post isn't to justify my current mental state. It's to let you know that no, I'm not okay and that yes, it's okay if you're not okay. It's okay to not be okay. Just make sure you're taking care of yourself. Make time for you. Talk to someone. Speak with a professional if you think it can help, it surely won't hurt.
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